‘Not a tennis court’ and other Google reviews of Sussex’s criminal courts

Public reviews for places on Google can be really useful, from finding places to eat to deciding where to get your car fixed.

Monday, 25th March 2019, 12:12 pm
Updated Monday, 25th March 2019, 12:16 pm
Reviews for various courts in Sussex are available on Google

But while many of the reviews left by members of the public about Sussex’s criminal courts may not be as useful, they are very amusing.

Some appear to have been written by former defendants, while one merely points out that you can’t play sports at Lewes Crown Court.

Here are a few of our favourites:

Many of the ratings are fairly low

Terry Bryatt on Lewes Crown Court: “I just hope the jury seating in the Court has improved over the last few years.

“The hard wooden jury bench gave me a bad back for longer than the defendant's jail sentence!”

‘Local guide’ Mark Kinglsey on Brighton Magistrates Court: “This place is excellent and I thoroughly recommend that if you are told to go to court by a policeman or police woman that you come to this place.

“It has everything you need it has a judge and it has nice police men and police women who will help you and will give you a nice bed in a nice safe room but nobody else can get in it is very good…”

Carl Bagley on Brighton Magistrates Court: “Terrible food and accommodation. Would not recommend.”

One reviewer with the username ‘CombineHarveystah’ on Lewes Crown Court: “It is not a tennis court.”

What appears to be a one-time defendant said of Lewes Crown Court: “Walking out. Four [prison] bags and found not guilty after six-ish months. Thanx Judge Brown.”